I Was Thinking...

WHAT is it about this time of the year that has many of us either going into overdrive, trying to tie up loose ends, or deeply introspective, meticulously evaluating the course of the year, to date? We increase productivity, we shop more, we workout out more, we connect with more friends and we eagerly anticipate the coming of a new year.  But why? Are we lamenting over our actions throughout the present year and are in need of a clean slate? Have our sown seeds shown us what is to come in the next season, that we cannot wait for it to manifest? I wonder...

USUALLY, I treat my birthdays as my own Personal New Year. Even when I wish others a "Happy Birthday" - Disclaimer: I do miss birthdays here and there, and kick myself for it because I want to catch everyone I know - I try to include "Personal New Year" somewhere in my message to the one in celebration.  It's one of the primary reasons I opt to travel on or around my birthday, to give myself permission to go inward, analyze my Journey, get to know me more and find out what about me is evolving.  Then, when New Year's Eve comes around, I am the guy who is happy staying in the house, watching TV, meditating or pigging out. Don't get me wrong, I do still hold on to some of the ritualistic superstitions like: making sure all of my laundry is washed, or detail-cleaning the house the day before, and even making sure I'm going into the new year with a certain amount of money in the bank and on my person. But, I also find myself stressing less and less, the closer to the closing of the year that we get. Nonetheless, I am intrigued by the way we, generally, start to get antsy in the final month of the year.

THIS year's Journey has taught me how to surrender and to let go; and in a myriad of ways. I look back over my steps and I realize the patterns of walking away from certain situations without hesitation, embracing new ideas and values with open arms, even understanding the loss of loved ones gone too soon. I realize that none of it is in vain and each step has either been with fully conscious intent or subconscious dharma, always informing the next step and contributing to the overall mission.  Even when I did not understand how - and there are certain lessons I still grapple with - I made the choice to lean more into Faith, instead of stress. I have learned that uncertainty is the greatest platform for opportunity. Now, I'm really starting to see that it is about the Journey, because the destination is a deceptive illusion that will have you chasing your own ego, before you get to taste the fruits of your desires.

PERHAPS, it is in my practice of silence and stillness that I have been able to reach this level of clarity.  Perhaps, this very moment is the only one that should be getting all of my attention.  Perhaps, I will stay on this effortless flow out of 2017 and step confidently into 2018, no rush necessary. Perhaps, I should challenge you to do the same.  Until soon...


#SmithDonnellE #OnMyMind #blogspot #NewYear #rocksteady